Answers in Genesis off to the Sydney Olympics!
by John Stear and Sir Jim R. Wallaby
The following startling information comes to us by courtesy of the amazing AiG Email News which, arriving at around the speed of light (despite creationists once asserting that the speed of light is slowing to a walk) landed in my in box with an audible thunk to proclaim that:
"A special mini edition of The Answers Book is being prepared for distribution at the Sydney 2000 Olympics. It will cover four 'big' questions: Is there really a God? What about the 'evidence' for evolution? Where did Cain get his wife? and Where did the 'races' come from? A Gospel presentation similar to the 'Here's the Good News' section in Creation magazine will be included in this handy outreach booklet. Tens of thousands of copies will, with your help and prayers, be printed. Christian groups are organising teams of trained volunteers to share the Gospel with the international Olympic crowds. When those volunteers are confronted with the inevitable 'What about evolution?' type objections, our Mini-Answers Booklet will be there to provide the desperately needed answers."
Just how "desperately needed" the answers to AiG's puerile questions will be to the majority of those attending and competing in the Olympics remains to be seen.
However, the indefatigable Sir Jim R. Wallaby has some idea of just how desperate AiG is to convert the world (especially the world Olympians).
Ah, yes, I can see it now. From around the world and around the nation they come; crowds of devout sports lovers congregating here for the Olympics, subscribers to Hindu, Muslim, Shintoist, Buddhist, Jain, Sikh, Jewish or Christian beliefs of many flavours, or to no discernible beliefs at all, and the most important question on their minds will certainly be, "Is there really a God".
Disregarding their mundane worries about whether the new swimming suits are aids to performance, they will be chiefly concerned with the question, "What is the evidence for evolution?" Rather than being bothered by the prevalence of performance enhancing drugs, the question uppermost in their minds will surely be, "Where did Cain get his wife?" Unperturbed at whether they are in the right venue to see the finals of the 400 metres race starring Kathy Freeman or whether Kieran Perkins can make it three 1500 metres victories in a row, they will surely be "desperate" to find out, "Where did the 'races' come from?". I mean why bother going to the Olympics at all if not to find out about Cain's marital problems?
I suspect that British soccer hooligans only become obstreperous because they can't find an answer to the "What about evolution?" question. Just as that very devout Christian, Hansie Cronje, was forced to take loads of money from Indian bookies because he didn't know the answer to the question "Where did the races come from?"
One would like to hope that the people congregating in Sydney for the 2000 Olympics will be hugely entertained at being accosted by earnest ratbags assailing them with questions about racial origins and Cainian matrimonial prospects, and not think it is typical of Australian life. One would also like to hope that the "mini" Answers Book is a little more accurate than the full version Australian Skeptics forced the creationists to pulp a decade or so back, because of its gross inaccuracies, but one would probably be whistling in the dark.
The really important question here is, are these people the biggest bunch of crass idiots ever collected together in one place, or not?